What to avoid in marriage is a lesson for everyone as presented in OpenLife Nigeria by a marriage coach Adebisi Atewologun in an interview with Isaac Ngumah
For the purpose of OpenLife Magazine’s readers across the world, who is Adebisi Atewologun?
Adebisi Atewologun is an enterprising purpose-driven and passionate coach and mentor to many individuals across the globe.
She helps working class singles and married people to discover and develop their personal economy regardless of the vocations they do and essentially what to avoid..
She is happily married to her best friend, Dayo Atewologun, 14 years ago. They are blessed with four great nations.
She wrote a best selling book on Family Finance and she is about to release her second book on her Journey to Motherhood, a book that will bring a shift to the minds of singles and the married to help them focus on their purpose as GOD originally designed the family system.
She holds her first and second degrees in Economics, a Chartered Accountant, an Online Business and Family Life Expert.
How has the experience been as a family life coach?
As a family life coach, I am happy helping people go beyond the limitations and negative influence of culture in our society.
Getting singles and married people to get beyond their limiting beliefs is an herculean task and I am sold out for it.
Doing family the team way is the best way.
This truth has to be preserved from generation to generation because family is the foundation of every society.
Have there been feedbacks?
I have had lots of feedbacks from readers whose mindset have shifted for the better after reading my books as well as my courses. They have learnt what to avoid in marriage.
A man that claims he loves his family but prevents his spouse from having a knowledge about how he earns and spends money is sitting on a gun powder waiting to explode. Beyond what society says, the truth is that there are millions of men cringing in their graves regretting their decision to exclude their spouse in some areas of their lives. A woman that keeps aside some money away from her husband in case he misbehaves has already put one feet at the exit door. Anything little offence can open the door further. “As a man thinketh so is he” Napoleon Hill.
Can you be specific on the number of people you have influenced?
I can’t say specifically how many people I have influenced. This is because I have been doing it on a freelance basis for many years before I got certified as a Master Marriage Mentor with The Institute for Marriage and Family Affairs USA in 2017.
Even as a single person I was counselling people to stop dating married people.
When I got married, some of my friends called me weird. That was because I decided to marry my friend who was not the richest person that asked for my hand in marriage but the person that fits my lifetime vision the most. Details of that are in my second book titled My Journey to Motherhood.
What is family finance?
Family Finance is the management of the income and expenses of a family over a period of time to cater for their needs.
When some people think about finance in their homes, their hearts skip out of fear and anger. This is because they are overwhelmed with talking the family finance activities. This shouldn’t be so.
It is recommended that both spouses be involved in this to ensure continuity and bonding in the family.
How can family strengthen bond?
A family can strengthen their bond when they dream together as a family, plan together, spend together and express themselves freely on how the home is being run without being afraid or fear of rejection.
How Books and Courses promote these projects?
My Books and Courses include:
Family Finance Secrets Aspiring and Married Couples Need to know in Maintaining a Financially Free Home. Hard copy and soft copy is available.
My Journey to Motherhood. This is yet to be published but it can be preordered.
Single and Confident Academy. It is a three months Course and one year Access for accountability which is renewable annually. It is an academy that prepares singles for marriage helping them to date right, and marry a spouse that matches their lifetime vision.
This course is a preferred one because it offers rich contents like how to have a healthy self esteem; how to handle pressure, value, personal vision discovery, dating tips with practical exercise, and self accountability.
This is a course for married couples to help them upgrade their parenting skills to modern day parenting without losing the timeless objectives of parenting.
It’s a one month course that will give parents a one year renewable access to our parenting community.
Intuitions in this Course involve Limiting Mindsets in Parenting; co-parenting issues; Parenting Models and what the recommended models; Practical life scenarios on parenting.
FABOLOUS KIDS ACADEMY
Fabolous kids Academy is a quarterly programme for children from the ages of 5 and 18 to help their parents in reinforcing values and to serve as an accountability partner for them.
JOCHEBED in the Bible nursed her son in conjunction with the daughter of Pharaoh, this had a tremendous impact on the upbringing of Moses…
Family Finance Academy
This helps couples harmonize their family finance taking them through the journey of limiting beliefs in Family Finance; Spender and Savers Discovery; Right and wrong ways to save money and How to plan Family Finance as a couple. Practical sessions that will have an immediate impact in the family.
There are also How to send money on errands; Guide to five and ten years goal of the family; The Dos and the Donts; Joint accounts, separate accounts and how to utilize it effectively.
Marriage with Ease Academy.
Course contents include Personality Assessment and their impact on couples love language and communication; Seasons in marriage and how to manage them; Weekly accountability dates between partners. What to say, how to say it and how to keep having it; how to enjoy being married to a busy spouse, the traps to look out for, the knowledge to put things all together and a detailed presentation on every activity your family will have one day 10 years from now.
However, there is a webinar on how to leverage on REAL ESTATE INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITIES as a single and married. It is billed to hold in May this year.
HOW TO INVEST IN FOREIGN STOCKS
This is being planned for September this year.
Journey to Motherhood to be launched in April via a paid webinar.
Interestingly, couples can be financially free when they plan their family finance in such a way that they have multiple sources of income; recurrent expenditure is less than recurrent income; lifestyle expenses are made from fruits of their investment and multiple income is well spread and is denominated in global currency.
It should however be noted that financial planning and budgeting in a home is very important because it will help couples to send money on the right errands.
Financial planning is the process of allocating expenses to different areas before it is spent. It is like folding clothes in a box. It will take more clothes compared to when the clothes are packed into a box.
When planning is tightly done, the tendency to be under pressure to spend money is minimized.
Earning capacity in couples is enhanced when both of them deploy their earning potential towards achieving the financial needs of the family.