“If You Remove Money
OpenLife Nigeria reports that in a widely discussed post on X, Nigerian pastor and renowned relationship coach Kingsley Okonkwo sparked intense debate about modern masculinity and leadership within marriage.
He wrote: “If you remove money most men don’t have what it takes to lead a woman, thats why most men want to hold on to the idea that a man’s main role is ‘providing’.”
The statement quickly gained significant traction, drawing thousands of likes, reposts, and comments as people weighed in on whether financial provision remains the primary pillar of male leadership or if deeper qualities—emotional, spiritual, mental, and moral are more essential in today’s relationships.
Okonkwo argued that many men cling to the “provider” identity because they lack confidence or capacity in other dimensions of leadership.
He described this reliance on money as partly rooted in “an outdated syllabus and archaic mindset” from a time when women had far fewer economic and social opportunities. In the current era, he suggested, women increasingly seek partners who can guide, inspire, protect, and connect on multiple levels beyond finances.The post struck a chord amid ongoing conversations about shifting gender roles, economic pressures in Nigeria, and the evolving expectations within marriages.
Supporters praised Okonkwo for calling men to develop well-rounded leadership skills, while critics felt the statement generalized too broadly or overlooked the real-world importance of financial stability.
BRIEF BIOGRAPHY OF PASTOR KINGSLEY OKONKWO
Kingsley Okonkwo, popularly known as “PK,” is a prominent Nigerian pastor, author, speaker, and one of Africa’s leading voices on love, dating, marriage, and family life.Born on January 29, 1976, he is the founder and senior pastor of David’s Christian Centre (DCC), a dynamic, multi-campus church headquartered in Lagos, Nigeria, with growing international outreach.Okonkwo is also the visionary behind the Love, Dating & Marriage (LDM) Ministry, a global platform that has reached hundreds of thousands of people across dozens of countries through seminars, books, online content, and conferences.
He holds professional certifications including presidential membership in the American Association of Christian Counsellors (AACC), board-certified Master Christian Life Coach status, and credentials as a certified relationship counselor.He is married to Mildred Kingsley-Okonkwo, his longtime partner in both life and ministry.
Mildred, a former media professional, now co-pastors DCC alongside her husband and is actively involved in teaching, blogging, and women’s outreach initiatives. The couple has been married for over two decades and together they have three children: Dassah, Davida, and David.
IMPACTFUL MINISTRY
Through David’s Christian Centre and the Love, Dating & Marriage (LDM) Ministry, Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo has built one of the most influential platforms in Africa focused on relationships and family life.
For over two decades, he and his wife Mildred have delivered practical, biblically grounded teachings via live seminars, online broadcasts, books, YouTube series, and annual events like the New Beginning Conference and Relationship Conferences. Their ministry equips singles, dating couples, and married people with tools for godly courtship, conflict resolution, intimacy, and long-term fulfillment, reaching audiences across continents and inspiring a generation to prioritize intentional, faith-centered relationships.
EFFECTS ON HOMES AND MARRIAGES
Pastor Okonkwo’s teachings have profoundly transformed countless homes and marriages, with many testimonies highlighting restored relationships, renewed trust, and healthier dynamics.
His emphasis on mutual respect, emotional intelligence, forgiveness, selflessness, and building marriages on Christ rather than human effort alone has helped couples move from enduring to enjoying their unions.
Through one-on-one counseling, masterclasses, and resources like devotionals, he has addressed issues such as broken trust, communication breakdowns, and outdated mindsets, leading to healed families, reduced conflicts, and stronger foundations.
Followers often credit his relatable style and direct advice with saving marriages, empowering singles to make better choices, and fostering environments where love, purpose, and godliness thrive proving that intentional application of his principles can turn struggling relationships into lasting testimonies of hope and restoration.
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